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so here we all are, huh? clicking and clacking away on keys. tapping ferociously on a blue screen at three am. all the energy, time and thought spent. and all in haste at that.
i don't know if anyone is coming to the screen with a clear mind anymore. like we're all waking up and before our feet hit the floor we check our phones. give your eyes a break, dude. read a book. go outside. turn on airplane mode and just walk around. listen to some music. figure out your center for the day before the internet figures it out for you.
we're waking up and instantly doomscrolling. instantly reposting reels. instantly tapping through people's stories. we've somehow created actual social etiquette around the internet and i think that's kind of bizarre. if somebody likes your story then they like you. if somebody is always the first person to watch your story they're obsessed with you. if they watched but didn't like it they're secretly jealous. if they unfollowed you then they're spiraling.
we've turned an app into a fortune teller.
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we want so badly to see ourselves reflected in the digital space that we'll invent little superstitions just to feel seen. we'll read into who viewed our story first like it's tea leaves. we'll convince ourselves an algorithm is trying to send us signs. somebody posts a vague caption and suddenly we're certain it's about us. somebody takes too long to reply and now they're mad.
we build entire narratives out of notifications because it's easier than accepting that sometimes a view is just a view and a like is just a thumb on a screen.
i don't even say that to judge anybody because i've done it too. i think we're all just looking for proof that we matter somewhere, even if that somewhere is an app designed to keep us scrolling.
i yearn for the old fashioned.
i miss when talking on the phone was the norm. and maybe it still is for some people. probably the people who are actually close. they call each other.
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our virtual landscape is so overstimulating. when i found myself not reaching for my phone first thing in the morning i quickly found solace in the silence. in the undisruptive beginning of my day. my mind was on what was in front of me.
my blankets, my books, my cat.
three things i love and also- three things that aren’t overstimulating.
the internet aims to stimulate us every single second. like second after second our feeds refresh with millions and millions of more thirty second skits, tutorials, ai fruit people, or what have you- its daunting. its honestly paralyzing. just being stuck on your phone all day- you lose your sense of self. YOUR sense of SELF.
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i’ve been getting comments across multiple platforms from accounts just trying to be nasty. and given that i’ve been building a presence online recently with my writing its only natural a few troglodytes come out the woodwork with something comically pathetic. but here’s whats cool. im not an internet baby. i am not on my phone seething out the mouth to see what other accounts have to say.
that’s what it is after all- one’s and zero’s attempting to get a rise out of me. i’d be insane to allow it.
the expansive internet we have in 2026 isn’t where you’re going to find yourself. it’ll definitely nudge you in either the right or wrong direction but that discretion is up to each user.
growing up for me is quieter. its not trending, or going live anymore. its not posing on top of the bar at work with my legs crossed like im princess diana and having my employees take photos of me like its my quinceañera.
yes that happened at my job. lol fucking nuts i tell you.
but the internet has us warped. i don’t think its possible to grow mentally if your doomscrolling on your phone first thing every morning. i just don’t.
Alexander Hassenstein / Getty Images
i unfollowed 96 percent of the accounts i used to follow. it was just not doing any good for me seeing all the yachts i couldn’t be on, the bodies ill never have, the houses ill never own. i did this in a fit of rebellion i suppose but to my surprise what came was a more intimate and familiar social media platform.
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now on my feed i see friends from high school, current friends, and accounts geared to what i’m actually interested in. my passions. that what the internet is for dude. at least for me. i’m honing how to use it in a way that beneficial for me and my future. im not using it to stalk anyone, or to coerce anybody.
those who are up at ungodly hours leaving comments on my posts under the guise of a spam account… at least subscribe to the substack next time- maybe by 40, you’ll be an even bigger fan.
& as always, thanks for reading.